Oh Look another wedding post! Sorry...

No I'm not sorry. I lied! What a terrible person I am! My wedding dress came this week. Its vintage! The seller described it as ready to wear and with out flaw which of course means it was so dirty it turned the water I washed it in turned grey and it needs a fair amount of of seam repair and neatening. Joy! Well it's been washed. It smells a lot better and isn't nearly as stiff. Look the lining is creamy white! Not yellow! hurrah!

Its been a very weddingy few days, tonight I tackle the invites. Not the filling out but the wording and the look. God help me. I understand why we can't just text every one and say "Oi, cake, some lovely feels and the odd photo opportunity. Be there." but only sort of. Can we have a moment to talk about how expensive stamps are? 60p. 60p for a bloody first class stamp. 50p for a second class stamp. So eh we'll be hand delivering most of them. And yes I am aware that e-invites are all the rage but parents and grand parents across the land are crying out "But i can't put an e-invite on the mantel or in a photo album!" Lets not even get on to the cost of save the dates and thank yous. Urk. Being polite is expensive people!

Tomorrow I will say nothing about the wedding, I promise. If I escape from a sea of "we request the pleasure of your company" that is. 

Minnie xoxo

Can we talk about gender and love for a quick moment

No one really thinks a certain way because of what their gender identity is. 

This mini rant is brought to you from too much perusing of wedding boards on Pinterest. You don't need a book or a series of inane blog posts or magazine articles to tell you how to relate to your other half. Just treat them like a person you care about! That's it be a decent human being, treat them like any other person you want to stick around with. Having mandatory date nights isn't going to bring you any closer together if you don't make an effort. A weekly trip to the climbing centre would just make me hate you. (I don't like heights.) You can still be selfish and alienate the other person while on the surface "trying."

Relationships, yet another place where the rule of Don't Be A Dick applies.

And the object of your affection in question fell for YOU, you just the way you are (hairy toes and all.*) Not some weird person who sends sickly sweet texts every Tuesday lunchtime (because you set a reminder), makes sure you have an official date every Thursday ever without fail and leave creepy little love missives in their lunch box. Unless you've always been like that. If you are I bow down to your amazing powers of organisation and perkiness. Will you be my friend? My after coffee and a good breakfast so I don't smash a
plate over your head friend?

I am nice to Bloke, honest.
Minnie xoxo

*Stop laughing at me, they aren't THAT hairy and I wax. HUMANS ARE MAMMALS! WE HAVE HAIR!

Revisiting Wedding Shame

So the last post was disjointed, weird and rambling. I think my main issue is the shame associated with weddings. "WHAT EVER YOU ARE DOING IS BAD AND WRONG! STOP THAT NOW! ITS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU! ITS YOUR DAY DO WHAT EVER YOU LIKE BUT NOT THAT!"

You spend too much money, or not enough. You are getting married, or you aren't. And you can bet the groom doesn't get the same kind of grilling (except Bloke, but he works with lots of little old ladies who want to know everything about him.) The problem is of course is that this is part of the idea that all the life choices women make are up for public discussion. Education. Marriage (and I include all legal and non legal bindings that may or may not be refereed to as marriage in here.) Babies, or not. And how much effort you put or not into the latter. Its all up for discussion and criticism! See also how you spend your money, the extent of your grooming regime and any other number of bizarre life choices.

Weddings are defiantly the big palooza though. Every one has an opinion, EVERYONE. And every one reads far too much into it all. Are having a big lavish do? well you must be putting the lot on a credit card! taking it out of your parent retirement fund! You terrible, terrible person. Its only one day! Having a cheap as chips party, making your own dress/buying second hand? You poor, poor dear! This is supposed to be YOUR DAY! Why don't you put it off a for a few years?!

I would say that I suspect these people have missed the point of marriage, but so many people do it. People who are other wise fairly normal. people who you wouldn't expect to be probing your financial and emotional plans.

SO MUCH SHAMING!

Fuck that noise. And on that note I'm off to try out my new delicious smelling coconut shampoo. I'm waiting on a parcel delivery and you can bet as soon as I jump in the shower the door bell will go.

Any of you get ridiculous "wisdom" of late? Minnie xoxo